First fight? Check!
We've had our first fight. I would wonder sometimes what our first fight would be about considering we seem to get along so well and 0ddly enough, it was about the same exact thing as my first fight with 42. The subject? Calling when you're out of town.
With 42, when I look back at everything that ended up happening, I've thought, "I should've known when he didn't call that weekend that things weren't going to work out." To me, it was a sign that I wasn't a priority to him and I should've listened to my gut about it. Especially when the reason why he didn't call was that his phone died and he didn't want to stop gaming to go outside in the snow to get the charger out of his car. This coming from the guy that plays Ultimate in the snow and thinks it's fun. I should have heeded the big red flag when it made itself known. But I didn't and I gave him the benefit of the doubt, but it ended up not working out for a multitude of reasons.
So. Now it's happened again with Greg, except it wasn't just a weekend, it was six days. He texted me every day, but just didn't pick up the phone to call. (I did check and he does know how to use a phone...) And this is just the dating tip of the month to everyone out there: Texting is not the same as a phone call. I talked to him Monday night and by Thursday I was feeling a little antsy and cranky about it, by Friday I was upset and all I can say is thank goodness I was playing games all day Saturday to keep my mind off of it. So by the time he called me Sunday night, I was not happy with him.
I try to love like I've never been hurt, but it can be difficult. I mean, I was upset that he didn't call, but I think it was compounded by the fact that the same thing has already happened with 42 and look how that turned out. Greg was very apologetic on Sunday and Monday and tonight I told him that my first fight with 42 was over the same thing. And then I made sure that I told him that I didn't think he was like 42. Because I don't. They're like night and day in all the right ways.
After he apologized again tonight and promised that he would try very (very, very, very) hard to make sure it doesn't happen again, I made the decision to not be angry with him anymore. I believe him when he says that he did want to talk to me and thought of me often. I believe that it's hard to shift from being single and carefree to having a girlfriend and having to think about someone else in a different way than you have had to do in a long time. I was married for 10 years and am the oldest child in my family, so for me, that's more second nature. Not that I don't fall down on the job from time-to-time because I'm sure I do, but for the most part, I try to incorporate my significant other (or friends/family as the case may be) into my thought processes.
In any case, we made it through, unscathed. Again, I was able to talk to him about what I was thinking and feeling and we seem to communicate well. I probably could've been more up front with the fact that I was upset and why I was upset. But to be honest, I forgot that my first fight with 42 was about the same thing until last night. And remembering that kind of made it worse to me. Also, I think my pattern is that if I'm angry, I'm very loud about what I'm upset about, but if I'm hurt or feel vulnerable, I get very, very quiet. Which is why I was being more quiet about being upset. I am feeling pretty confident though that it won't happen again.
Showing posts with label 42. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 42. Show all posts
Monday, August 18, 2008
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
I have a boyfriend!
I went to Atlanta a single woman, not looking forward to seeing her ex and worried about a guy that I had just broken things off with back at home. The last thing on my mind was "Hey, maybe I'll meet someone..." But, that's exactly what happened! I met him on Wednesday night and forgot his name like five seconds after he told it to me, which he gave me a hard time about...
Then on Thursday, I sat next to him at lunch and he proceeded to give me a hard time about just about anything I said! In fact, Michael, John AND Athens (that's what I'm calling him) were ALL giving me a hard time and I was loving every minute of it! This lunchtime was a pivotal point because I ended up getting a lot of facts about him. I already kinda thought he was cute and his personality seemed good... He mentioned that he had just bought a house in January (good...), but that he hadn't had time to really work on projects because he was too busy with church, gaming and volunteering. Yes, in one breath, he named three interests I would LOVE to share with a boyfriend/husband!
On our way back from lunch, Valerie intercepted me for a debriefing in the ladies room about various items (more on that later), one of which was that she wanted to impress upon me was that he was single, looking, an overall great guy and definitely wants to have kids! Also things I'm looking for... (Valerie, for the record, is an awesome wing woman... she really helped me out a lot this past weekend!) In fact, when compared to the Ideal Husband Checklist, so far, he's passing with flying colors. No negatives and a few unknowns still, but based on what I know about him so far, they most likely will be checked off. I think I'm going to have to assign bonus points for being an Eagle Scout too.
In fact, throughout the entire weekend, he didn't say or do anything that was even remotely flag-raising... We spent almost four whole days together and the only thing we could find that we're not in huge agreement about is music tastes and he's a hardcore Bulldog and I was born a Gator (although truth be told, I'm fine with switching because I look better in red anyway). Every time he opened his mouth or did something, it just got better and better.
Things that he did that I adored...
He opened all my doors for me, carried around anything heavy if we were walking somewhere, kept my mom company while I said good-byes and paid my hotel bill, killed two bugs for me that happened to cross my path, paid for my lunch on Sunday (and then said, "I've been trying to do that all weekend but everyone else kept buying your food!"), didn't hesitate to try to rescue me from a conversation with 42, (even better) didn't get jealous at all when I talked to 42, reminded me to send a postcard to my friend, and just overall is really cool.
We spent a lot of time talking over the weekend so I feel like I really got a sense of who he is. He is a really solid, dependable, upstanding person. I really admire him. Like Tim said... spending four days together at a con is the equivalent of a month of regular casual dating... I can't wait to spend more time with him. We talked about that and it looks like I'm going to go see him after Gulf Games for about five days. Possibly longer, but we'll wait to see on that. The sucky part is that that isn't until the beginning of August.
As for the boyfriend/girlfriend thing... We talked about it today and decided that it's "official"! And just so I didn't run into the same problem as with 42, I clarified to make sure that us calling each other boyfriend/girlfriend also meant we weren't seeing other people, which is exactly what he meant. (I never would've thought to ask someone that until that happened with 42...)
Because Valerie was instrumental in the whole pointing us at each other, I texted her to let her know that we were "officially" a couple and she was thrilled. I started getting texts from her, IMs from Dale and more texts from James (they're all at Origins together) until finally Valerie just called me and put me on speakerphone so I could tell them the whole story and fill them in on the details! Then Tyler piped up with "Did you change your status on MySpace?" I couldn't stop laughing, mainly because I hadn't (since it had just happened), but I had already been considering changing it even though it wasn't official. Yesterday, I contacted eHarmony and told them to quit sending me matches because I knew I wasn't interested in anyone else at this point. I did change my Facebook and MySpace status. It's funny! It's like a big announcement to everyone who's on Facebook! I told FaceBook that Athens was my boyfriend and they sent a request for confirmation to him so he could OK it. I guess it's a good thing I never tried to falsely say Josh Charles was my boyfriend! :-) But I can assure you, Josh Charles ain't got nothin' on my boyfriend.
The best part? It's completely mutual. We both really like each other, I'm not stressed at all when I think about him (a new feeling or rather lack of feeling) and there's no doubt in my mind about how he feels about me because he lets me know often. He's very communicative which is something that is a must-have for me.
All I can say is that I know it's good when I find myself laughing and giggling when alone in the car and thinking of him. I can't wait for all my friends to meet him! No set plans just yet on when he's headed this way, but hopefully soon!
Then on Thursday, I sat next to him at lunch and he proceeded to give me a hard time about just about anything I said! In fact, Michael, John AND Athens (that's what I'm calling him) were ALL giving me a hard time and I was loving every minute of it! This lunchtime was a pivotal point because I ended up getting a lot of facts about him. I already kinda thought he was cute and his personality seemed good... He mentioned that he had just bought a house in January (good...), but that he hadn't had time to really work on projects because he was too busy with church, gaming and volunteering. Yes, in one breath, he named three interests I would LOVE to share with a boyfriend/husband!
On our way back from lunch, Valerie intercepted me for a debriefing in the ladies room about various items (more on that later), one of which was that she wanted to impress upon me was that he was single, looking, an overall great guy and definitely wants to have kids! Also things I'm looking for... (Valerie, for the record, is an awesome wing woman... she really helped me out a lot this past weekend!) In fact, when compared to the Ideal Husband Checklist, so far, he's passing with flying colors. No negatives and a few unknowns still, but based on what I know about him so far, they most likely will be checked off. I think I'm going to have to assign bonus points for being an Eagle Scout too.
In fact, throughout the entire weekend, he didn't say or do anything that was even remotely flag-raising... We spent almost four whole days together and the only thing we could find that we're not in huge agreement about is music tastes and he's a hardcore Bulldog and I was born a Gator (although truth be told, I'm fine with switching because I look better in red anyway). Every time he opened his mouth or did something, it just got better and better.
Things that he did that I adored...
He opened all my doors for me, carried around anything heavy if we were walking somewhere, kept my mom company while I said good-byes and paid my hotel bill, killed two bugs for me that happened to cross my path, paid for my lunch on Sunday (and then said, "I've been trying to do that all weekend but everyone else kept buying your food!"), didn't hesitate to try to rescue me from a conversation with 42, (even better) didn't get jealous at all when I talked to 42, reminded me to send a postcard to my friend, and just overall is really cool.
We spent a lot of time talking over the weekend so I feel like I really got a sense of who he is. He is a really solid, dependable, upstanding person. I really admire him. Like Tim said... spending four days together at a con is the equivalent of a month of regular casual dating... I can't wait to spend more time with him. We talked about that and it looks like I'm going to go see him after Gulf Games for about five days. Possibly longer, but we'll wait to see on that. The sucky part is that that isn't until the beginning of August.
As for the boyfriend/girlfriend thing... We talked about it today and decided that it's "official"! And just so I didn't run into the same problem as with 42, I clarified to make sure that us calling each other boyfriend/girlfriend also meant we weren't seeing other people, which is exactly what he meant. (I never would've thought to ask someone that until that happened with 42...)
Because Valerie was instrumental in the whole pointing us at each other, I texted her to let her know that we were "officially" a couple and she was thrilled. I started getting texts from her, IMs from Dale and more texts from James (they're all at Origins together) until finally Valerie just called me and put me on speakerphone so I could tell them the whole story and fill them in on the details! Then Tyler piped up with "Did you change your status on MySpace?" I couldn't stop laughing, mainly because I hadn't (since it had just happened), but I had already been considering changing it even though it wasn't official. Yesterday, I contacted eHarmony and told them to quit sending me matches because I knew I wasn't interested in anyone else at this point. I did change my Facebook and MySpace status. It's funny! It's like a big announcement to everyone who's on Facebook! I told FaceBook that Athens was my boyfriend and they sent a request for confirmation to him so he could OK it. I guess it's a good thing I never tried to falsely say Josh Charles was my boyfriend! :-) But I can assure you, Josh Charles ain't got nothin' on my boyfriend.
The best part? It's completely mutual. We both really like each other, I'm not stressed at all when I think about him (a new feeling or rather lack of feeling) and there's no doubt in my mind about how he feels about me because he lets me know often. He's very communicative which is something that is a must-have for me.
All I can say is that I know it's good when I find myself laughing and giggling when alone in the car and thinking of him. I can't wait for all my friends to meet him! No set plans just yet on when he's headed this way, but hopefully soon!
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
In Hotlanta Once Again
I'm in Atlanta once more for the Oasis of Fun which starts tomorrow night. One thing that is definitely different this time is that I will be seeing 42, whom I haven't seen since we broke up. I am feeling completely fine with it and we've already arranged to play Race for the Galaxy together. I'm curious to see how I'll feel after seeing him. My guess is that I'll feel the same way I'm feeling now... We've communicated a fair amount over the last few weeks and apparently, he's busy with a hoard of women, including his ex-girlfriend (and I think he was including me!). Just a month ago, I was feeling some fairly strong residual feelings for him, but a lot has happened since then and I think they've severely subsided. I guess I'll know exactly how much once I see him this weekend!
I'm really looking forward to seeing my friends, some of whom I haven't seen since the OoF last summer! Also, Dale is unable to make it so I promised that if I could acquire a webcam (I left mine at home), I would stream up some video so he could check in on us every once in a while! So, there may be some streaming video this weekend! He put out the call for the webcam and if anyone has one, I guess I'll find out soon!
I saw my friend MeeMe today who I haven't seen in ages!! I think the last time I saw her was about 14 years ago. Here's a picture of us from lunchtime today!
When I get home, I'll have to dig up the old picture I have from the last time we saw each other. She looks a little more "grown-up" but other than that, exactly the same. She said I look exactly how she remembered me too. I guess it might be time for another hairstyle? I am quite partial to long hair though... Maybe a haircut for the summer is in order.
I'm really looking forward to seeing my friends, some of whom I haven't seen since the OoF last summer! Also, Dale is unable to make it so I promised that if I could acquire a webcam (I left mine at home), I would stream up some video so he could check in on us every once in a while! So, there may be some streaming video this weekend! He put out the call for the webcam and if anyone has one, I guess I'll find out soon!
I saw my friend MeeMe today who I haven't seen in ages!! I think the last time I saw her was about 14 years ago. Here's a picture of us from lunchtime today!
When I get home, I'll have to dig up the old picture I have from the last time we saw each other. She looks a little more "grown-up" but other than that, exactly the same. She said I look exactly how she remembered me too. I guess it might be time for another hairstyle? I am quite partial to long hair though... Maybe a haircut for the summer is in order.
Wednesday, June 04, 2008
Update from Dallas
It's been another week since I've been in Dallas and wow, I'm sore! Why? Because I took my first Krav Maga class. It's a style of fighting that the Israeli army uses. It's for close combat. I enjoyed the class quite a bit, but oh my, I'm so freaking sore!
Monday night I went to see the Sex and the City Movie. I liked it, hardly surprising considering I loved the show. One thing I always love about that show is that there's always some kernel of relationship truth in it. Something that is relate-able. In the movie, Carrie calls herself an "emotional cutter." I started dying laughing because I've been feeling like I've been an emotional cutter lately. Why? (Maybe I should rename this post to "Why?")
I got an email from 42 out of the blue last week and we've exchanged some emails since then. Mainly just catching up, but naturally I've been thinking about him and our relationship more. Sometimes it makes me sad and other times it just gets me thinking about the past. The last few weeks have been busy with dating in between work stuff, but I don't feel like going into all that. Especially since I've hardly written anything about dating stuffs since 42 & I broke up in March. I'll have to write an update on that sometime soon, I haven't quite decided about that just yet.
On Tuesday, I worked and then went to play games with the Dallas Gamers. I ended up playing Kingsburg, Rails of Europe and Race for the Galaxy. Man, I *still* really love that game!
I worked today and then spent the afternoon and evening playing poker! It was pretty fun. My table was good. There were a couple cool guys there and I was Nickname Girl. I nicknamed everyone at the table (whether or not they liked it or not). We had Golf Guy (who was quite the cutie), Fiance Guy (who got later renamed to Tat Guy at his request), New Guy, Quiet Guy, LA Guy, Oil Guy, and Tan Guy (who later was renamed to Raiser Guy because he kept raising all the pre-flops). I think I ended up down a bit for the trip, but I am definitely getting better. I felt like I was betting better and I'm trying to get better at reading people based on their actions. My problem is that I just go with my gut and not really with the logical assumptions. That is an area that I need work on.
Monday night I went to see the Sex and the City Movie. I liked it, hardly surprising considering I loved the show. One thing I always love about that show is that there's always some kernel of relationship truth in it. Something that is relate-able. In the movie, Carrie calls herself an "emotional cutter." I started dying laughing because I've been feeling like I've been an emotional cutter lately. Why? (Maybe I should rename this post to "Why?")
I got an email from 42 out of the blue last week and we've exchanged some emails since then. Mainly just catching up, but naturally I've been thinking about him and our relationship more. Sometimes it makes me sad and other times it just gets me thinking about the past. The last few weeks have been busy with dating in between work stuff, but I don't feel like going into all that. Especially since I've hardly written anything about dating stuffs since 42 & I broke up in March. I'll have to write an update on that sometime soon, I haven't quite decided about that just yet.
On Tuesday, I worked and then went to play games with the Dallas Gamers. I ended up playing Kingsburg, Rails of Europe and Race for the Galaxy. Man, I *still* really love that game!
I worked today and then spent the afternoon and evening playing poker! It was pretty fun. My table was good. There were a couple cool guys there and I was Nickname Girl. I nicknamed everyone at the table (whether or not they liked it or not). We had Golf Guy (who was quite the cutie), Fiance Guy (who got later renamed to Tat Guy at his request), New Guy, Quiet Guy, LA Guy, Oil Guy, and Tan Guy (who later was renamed to Raiser Guy because he kept raising all the pre-flops). I think I ended up down a bit for the trip, but I am definitely getting better. I felt like I was betting better and I'm trying to get better at reading people based on their actions. My problem is that I just go with my gut and not really with the logical assumptions. That is an area that I need work on.
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Tomorrow is my birthday
Tomorrow is my birthday... woo-hoo...
I usually look forward to my birthday, but this year has been different. I don't really care about the aging part, I just wish that my life was less stressful right now. I'm stressed at work and in my personal life...
My goals for April are to recover from the break-up, exercise & sleep more, and not plan anything else in April. I'm booked for most of April already and it seems like work is going to be crazy for the next two months due to today being our fiscal year end.
That said, I better get to sleep!
I usually look forward to my birthday, but this year has been different. I don't really care about the aging part, I just wish that my life was less stressful right now. I'm stressed at work and in my personal life...
My goals for April are to recover from the break-up, exercise & sleep more, and not plan anything else in April. I'm booked for most of April already and it seems like work is going to be crazy for the next two months due to today being our fiscal year end.
That said, I better get to sleep!
Friday, March 21, 2008
Broken Up
I guess you can't technically "break up" with someone you're not "exclusively dating," but that's beside the point. Or maybe that's exactly the point. Either way...
We (42 & I) were fighting much too often. He thinks I was picking the fights, which is probably what it seemed like to him. Meanwhile, I think I was trying to talk to him about stuff that I was concerned about and our communication styles(?) when dealing with more important things (to me at least) just did not match up. At all. There were several other smaller things, but this one seemed to be the major problem.
My ex-boss used to tell me that you need to find someone with whom you share a backbone (like the core beliefs/values) and someone who shares your neuroses. It seemed like we shared a similar backbone so that part was good, but we weren't so lined up on the neuroses part. I know I have my own and I really need someone that can deal with them. And hopefully when that happens at some point in the future, I'll be able to deal with his. Whoever he is.
The part that really sucks is that I do like him and we could probably be good friends, but we were just not a good romantic match. Attraction? Yes. Effective communication? Not so much.
The part that's really great is I've learned more about myself through this and hopefully that will help with future relationships.
I wasn't at my desk to respond to the last thing he said to me (yes, this all happened via IM) and it's been bothering me, but I'm just letting it simmer for now. I don't think calling him will do much good at this point. Plus, I can't believe that he really thinks I don't care, even now. And if he does think that, I have nothing more to say to him.
I'm so glad I'm leaving for Vegas tomorrow morning! I need the distraction!
We (42 & I) were fighting much too often. He thinks I was picking the fights, which is probably what it seemed like to him. Meanwhile, I think I was trying to talk to him about stuff that I was concerned about and our communication styles(?) when dealing with more important things (to me at least) just did not match up. At all. There were several other smaller things, but this one seemed to be the major problem.
My ex-boss used to tell me that you need to find someone with whom you share a backbone (like the core beliefs/values) and someone who shares your neuroses. It seemed like we shared a similar backbone so that part was good, but we weren't so lined up on the neuroses part. I know I have my own and I really need someone that can deal with them. And hopefully when that happens at some point in the future, I'll be able to deal with his. Whoever he is.
The part that really sucks is that I do like him and we could probably be good friends, but we were just not a good romantic match. Attraction? Yes. Effective communication? Not so much.
The part that's really great is I've learned more about myself through this and hopefully that will help with future relationships.
I wasn't at my desk to respond to the last thing he said to me (yes, this all happened via IM) and it's been bothering me, but I'm just letting it simmer for now. I don't think calling him will do much good at this point. Plus, I can't believe that he really thinks I don't care, even now. And if he does think that, I have nothing more to say to him.
I'm so glad I'm leaving for Vegas tomorrow morning! I need the distraction!
Monday, March 10, 2008
"Boyfriend" Update
It's been a while since I've done an update on how things are going with 42. We just spent the past weekend together and I think we're both in agreement that this was our best weekend yet! The first few were good, but I always felt like there was something missing at the end of them. But this time was different. I didn't feel like there was a missing piece, which was a huge relief.
We had a great time... He took me to the park and he taught me how to throw a Frisbee in a whole new way for me. He plays Ultimate and he's awesome at throwing that thing! I was already OK at the "normal" way of throwing (thanks to coaching from Seth last year), but this new way was pretty fun too. We did that until it started raining and then headed home for some Race for the Galaxy!
That night, I met some friends he's known since high school. Those guys were pretty fun! I can see why he likes hanging out with them every week. On Saturday, he took me to meet his parents. I had no idea before I arrived for the weekend that that was the plan, so I was a bit surprised! On our way, we picked up his brother, so I got to meet his immediate family. His parents are really nice and just really sweet people. The best part was I felt like I got to know him better by seeing where he comes from. And of course, could I imagine having them for in-laws? Yeah, I could. Oh, and they seemed to like me too, so that part of the weekend went really well.
Oh... I know I called this my "boyfriend" update, but here's something I haven't really mentioned previously: we're not technically "boyfriend/girlfriend." I had previously said that I had a boyfriend, but after further examination (you know, like having a conversation with him!), I found out that we weren't dating exclusively, at least not in his opinion. Not that either one of us is seeing/pursuing anyone else (at least not that I know of, but who knows?), we're just not seeing each other "exclusively." I go through mental gymnastics about this every day (sometimes multiple times a day!), but for now, I'll just have to stick it out. At least until I can't stand it anymore. I still view him as my unofficial boyfriend, whether that's right or wrong. I just don't call him that anymore in conversation. I just use his name or "the guy I'm dating." And so far as I know, he doesn't refer to me as his girlfriend, so I think we're OK there. As far as dating other people, I just don't have much interest to actively seek anyone else out. I guess I could technically date someone else, but I'll just cross that bridge when I come to it. I want to see how things go with him first
And so far, they seem to be going well! Definitely better than they were a week or two ago. One good sign is that when we talked today about our next rendezvous and he said that the next completely free weekend for him was the third weekend in April, I was upset. Not at him really, but at the situation! That's six weeks away!! Having a long distance relationship sucks sometimes!
And just to be fair, not everything is perfect. We have our "issues" (both individually and together) and we're dealing with them. Hopefully, they'll even get worked out. But sometimes (like today!), it seems pretty darn impossible, especially when we're only going to see each other every 4-6 weeks. But oh well. That's how it is! I can only deal with reality and the reality is we're just trying to figure it out as we go along.
We had a great time... He took me to the park and he taught me how to throw a Frisbee in a whole new way for me. He plays Ultimate and he's awesome at throwing that thing! I was already OK at the "normal" way of throwing (thanks to coaching from Seth last year), but this new way was pretty fun too. We did that until it started raining and then headed home for some Race for the Galaxy!
That night, I met some friends he's known since high school. Those guys were pretty fun! I can see why he likes hanging out with them every week. On Saturday, he took me to meet his parents. I had no idea before I arrived for the weekend that that was the plan, so I was a bit surprised! On our way, we picked up his brother, so I got to meet his immediate family. His parents are really nice and just really sweet people. The best part was I felt like I got to know him better by seeing where he comes from. And of course, could I imagine having them for in-laws? Yeah, I could. Oh, and they seemed to like me too, so that part of the weekend went really well.
Oh... I know I called this my "boyfriend" update, but here's something I haven't really mentioned previously: we're not technically "boyfriend/girlfriend." I had previously said that I had a boyfriend, but after further examination (you know, like having a conversation with him!), I found out that we weren't dating exclusively, at least not in his opinion. Not that either one of us is seeing/pursuing anyone else (at least not that I know of, but who knows?), we're just not seeing each other "exclusively." I go through mental gymnastics about this every day (sometimes multiple times a day!), but for now, I'll just have to stick it out. At least until I can't stand it anymore. I still view him as my unofficial boyfriend, whether that's right or wrong. I just don't call him that anymore in conversation. I just use his name or "the guy I'm dating." And so far as I know, he doesn't refer to me as his girlfriend, so I think we're OK there. As far as dating other people, I just don't have much interest to actively seek anyone else out. I guess I could technically date someone else, but I'll just cross that bridge when I come to it. I want to see how things go with him first
And so far, they seem to be going well! Definitely better than they were a week or two ago. One good sign is that when we talked today about our next rendezvous and he said that the next completely free weekend for him was the third weekend in April, I was upset. Not at him really, but at the situation! That's six weeks away!! Having a long distance relationship sucks sometimes!
And just to be fair, not everything is perfect. We have our "issues" (both individually and together) and we're dealing with them. Hopefully, they'll even get worked out. But sometimes (like today!), it seems pretty darn impossible, especially when we're only going to see each other every 4-6 weeks. But oh well. That's how it is! I can only deal with reality and the reality is we're just trying to figure it out as we go along.
Thursday, March 06, 2008
I'm off once again
I'm off once again to go see 42. I leave tonight and return on Sunday night. I doubt I'll be online much between now and then. I know I'm overdue for an update on how things are going with him. I think there's a good chance that I'll post something next week!
Friday, February 22, 2008
Gulf Games Day #1
I drove in from Mississippi after my visit with Carolyn last night. It's about a five hour drive, so I called my boss to find out if there was any update to the big project we were working on the week or so before I left for vacation. Long story short: I worked all night on Wednesday and all day Thursday. Obviously, I'm NOT using vacation time for today!
I finally took a shower and got dressed and ventured out into the real world around 6:30 and ran into Dale & co. They intercepted me for dinner and then we were off to Five Guys Burgers! 42 has told me SO much about Five Guys because they are based in Philly and he loves them, but we've never actually made it over to check it out when I've visited him the last couple times. I put about 8 toppings on my burger and it was tasty. I'd definitely try it again! The fries were really good, homemade and yummy.
After dinner, we had our welcome party. I didn't win Take it Easy at my table. There are a lot of newcomers, probably about half of whom I've already met at other cons. I'm already behind in the Friendliest Gamer contest for this Gulf Games, not sure if I can make up the deficit of being holed up in my room all day today.
Highlights of gaming tonight: We played Traumfabrik with five players and I won! With 100 points! It was quite exciting! We also played a couple games of Tichu and I over-called Jon many times during our game and broke him almost every time! It was awesome! I just kept getting the cards to do it. It was fun!
I might go to the Unclaimed Baggage store tomorrow, but considering I have to be ready to go in 5 1/2 hours, I'm not too sure I'll get up in time. I'm going to set my alarm and see how I feel in the morning!
I finally took a shower and got dressed and ventured out into the real world around 6:30 and ran into Dale & co. They intercepted me for dinner and then we were off to Five Guys Burgers! 42 has told me SO much about Five Guys because they are based in Philly and he loves them, but we've never actually made it over to check it out when I've visited him the last couple times. I put about 8 toppings on my burger and it was tasty. I'd definitely try it again! The fries were really good, homemade and yummy.
After dinner, we had our welcome party. I didn't win Take it Easy at my table. There are a lot of newcomers, probably about half of whom I've already met at other cons. I'm already behind in the Friendliest Gamer contest for this Gulf Games, not sure if I can make up the deficit of being holed up in my room all day today.
Highlights of gaming tonight: We played Traumfabrik with five players and I won! With 100 points! It was quite exciting! We also played a couple games of Tichu and I over-called Jon many times during our game and broke him almost every time! It was awesome! I just kept getting the cards to do it. It was fun!
I might go to the Unclaimed Baggage store tomorrow, but considering I have to be ready to go in 5 1/2 hours, I'm not too sure I'll get up in time. I'm going to set my alarm and see how I feel in the morning!
Sunday, February 03, 2008
Our First Fight
This past Tuesday, 42 and I had our first official fight! Via instant messenger, no less! That's a first for me. I know I said a couple things I shouldn't have and now they're recorded in our chat history. Forever.
The good news? I was really pissed off and I: (a) didn't break up with him, or even feel like breaking up with him during the fight (actually quite the opposite!), and (b) talked to him that night and we agreed to do certain things for each other and we were fine. More than fine.
For me, I think that was the weirdest part. It seems like when I was with Jason, we'd have fights that lingered for days. Looking back, I think the reason for that was because those fights were about fundamental life issues/goals that were not easily resolved. Well, considering we're divorced, I guess those things never got resolved!
It's really interesting (and so much less stressful) to be with someone who I don't have to worry about fighting about unresolvable life issues. We talked about all the major life issues (that we could think of) at the very beginning and seem to be remarkably compatible. Now we just need to see if our styles are compatible enough. Only time will tell!
The good news? I was really pissed off and I: (a) didn't break up with him, or even feel like breaking up with him during the fight (actually quite the opposite!), and (b) talked to him that night and we agreed to do certain things for each other and we were fine. More than fine.
For me, I think that was the weirdest part. It seems like when I was with Jason, we'd have fights that lingered for days. Looking back, I think the reason for that was because those fights were about fundamental life issues/goals that were not easily resolved. Well, considering we're divorced, I guess those things never got resolved!
It's really interesting (and so much less stressful) to be with someone who I don't have to worry about fighting about unresolvable life issues. We talked about all the major life issues (that we could think of) at the very beginning and seem to be remarkably compatible. Now we just need to see if our styles are compatible enough. Only time will tell!
Sunday, January 27, 2008
I Do Not Run a Vegetarian-Friendly Household
The last time I visited 42, we stopped by his favorite hoagie shop to pick up, well, hoagies (of course), but more importantly, pepper shooters! He had extolled their virtues on the phone to me many a time, so I finally had the chance to try one! And they were good! A pepper shooter consists of a hunk of extra sharp provolone, wrapped with prosciutto, that's been stuffed into a cherry pepper. Even better, they also had they're special creation, the salamincini, which is basically the same idea: a hunk of extra sharp provolone, wrapped with salami, stuffed inside a peperoncini! I preferred those, but probably because of the flavor of the pepper more than anything.
One of the reasons we made the 30 minute trek to this hoagie shop was because they had these pepper shooters. 42 wants me to learn how to make them and make them for him! Ah, do I love a challenge! So on Saturday, I decided to try making them. I made both types and the soaked them in olive oil overnight. They're good, but they don't taste exactly like the ones I had when I visited him. I'm going to call the sandwich shop to see if I can get any more information from them on how to make them. Here's how they're looking...
The point is, I have some friends coming over tomorrow night to play Die Macher. I was going to offer them as snacks tomorrow night, then I remembered, OH WAIT, one of them's a vegetarian. So I guess I'll just warn him about the meat content.
This is the second time in the last month or so that I'd have to warn a vegetarian off of a seemingly innocuous dish! Who would expect pickled peppers to have meat in them? The last time was during Bakefest 2007, when we made the bacon chocolate chip cookies. I had my friend Gary (also a vegetarian) come by and I had to warn him about the bacon content in the cookies! Not a normal warning, I'm sure! :-)
Oh, and I've been meaning to post a picture of this because it's too good to not get a mention in the blog... For my New Year's Eve party, Shannon made a retro meat-tacular appetizer! The meat tree!!!
O Meat-Cheese Tree...
Isn't that amazing? When she walked in we were all amazed I took the picture with my tree in the background for sizing. That was a pretty tall tree, at least 7 ft tall! It was covered with cocktail wieners, hunks of cheddar and pepper jack cheese, pigs in a blanket, gherkin pickles, olives and I think that's it. It was delicious!! And talk about presentation! It was quite festive and was a huge hit!!
Meat & Cheese tree close-up
One of the reasons we made the 30 minute trek to this hoagie shop was because they had these pepper shooters. 42 wants me to learn how to make them and make them for him! Ah, do I love a challenge! So on Saturday, I decided to try making them. I made both types and the soaked them in olive oil overnight. They're good, but they don't taste exactly like the ones I had when I visited him. I'm going to call the sandwich shop to see if I can get any more information from them on how to make them. Here's how they're looking...
The point is, I have some friends coming over tomorrow night to play Die Macher. I was going to offer them as snacks tomorrow night, then I remembered, OH WAIT, one of them's a vegetarian. So I guess I'll just warn him about the meat content.
This is the second time in the last month or so that I'd have to warn a vegetarian off of a seemingly innocuous dish! Who would expect pickled peppers to have meat in them? The last time was during Bakefest 2007, when we made the bacon chocolate chip cookies. I had my friend Gary (also a vegetarian) come by and I had to warn him about the bacon content in the cookies! Not a normal warning, I'm sure! :-)
Oh, and I've been meaning to post a picture of this because it's too good to not get a mention in the blog... For my New Year's Eve party, Shannon made a retro meat-tacular appetizer! The meat tree!!!
O Meat-Cheese Tree...Isn't that amazing? When she walked in we were all amazed I took the picture with my tree in the background for sizing. That was a pretty tall tree, at least 7 ft tall! It was covered with cocktail wieners, hunks of cheddar and pepper jack cheese, pigs in a blanket, gherkin pickles, olives and I think that's it. It was delicious!! And talk about presentation! It was quite festive and was a huge hit!!
Meat & Cheese tree close-up
Saturday, January 26, 2008
Webcam
One downside to having a long-distance boyfriend is that it means MUCH less face time! We do talk to each other pretty often, but that's clearly not the same as spending time together. To try to make up for that, we decided to buy matching webcams! We bought Logitech Quickcam Ultra Vision cameras. I received mine a couple days ago and he should receive his on Monday. Then we can give it a real try. So far, we've talked online where he could see me via Windows Messenger Live.
I've been having one problem though. I keep getting the blue screen of death! I updated the software and it didn't happen for a couple days until I was trying to stream some video on the blog tonight. Something in the software is causing it to do that, but I'm not sure what. I'm going to ask my computer guy when I see him next week to see if he has any suggestions.
I'm not planning on actually streaming video to the blog really, but I wanted to see how exactly it would work. Pretty cool!! I'm curious to see what it's like talking with him when I can see him. Now I'll have to worry about what I look like even when I'm lounging around at home!
I've been having one problem though. I keep getting the blue screen of death! I updated the software and it didn't happen for a couple days until I was trying to stream some video on the blog tonight. Something in the software is causing it to do that, but I'm not sure what. I'm going to ask my computer guy when I see him next week to see if he has any suggestions.
I'm not planning on actually streaming video to the blog really, but I wanted to see how exactly it would work. Pretty cool!! I'm curious to see what it's like talking with him when I can see him. Now I'll have to worry about what I look like even when I'm lounging around at home!
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Boyfriend!
I'm not sure what exactly turns a "guy I'm dating" into an official "boyfriend," but I think I have one! At least I called him that and he seems to like it! :-) Things have been progressing with 42. I really like him. We have some major common interests (games, food and each other!) and goals, but we have differences too and that part we're working on to see if they can be ironed out.
The biggest problem? He lives across the country. Yes, a long distance relationship. I've been out there to visit him a couple times, we talk on the phone everyday and he's coming out to visit me in a couple weeks. He's never been to California, so I've been making a list of places to see, well, more accurately, things to eat while he's out here. So far, In-n-Out, juicy pork dumplings from Din Tai Fung, a sandwich from Tony's Deli in Burbank, Scoops and sushi are on the list... mmmm... Plus, I want to take him to the beach, have Shane meet him, cook him dinner and make pepper shooters! Somehow, I doubt we'll get all of that done, but it's good to have goals.
The biggest problem? He lives across the country. Yes, a long distance relationship. I've been out there to visit him a couple times, we talk on the phone everyday and he's coming out to visit me in a couple weeks. He's never been to California, so I've been making a list of places to see, well, more accurately, things to eat while he's out here. So far, In-n-Out, juicy pork dumplings from Din Tai Fung, a sandwich from Tony's Deli in Burbank, Scoops and sushi are on the list... mmmm... Plus, I want to take him to the beach, have Shane meet him, cook him dinner and make pepper shooters! Somehow, I doubt we'll get all of that done, but it's good to have goals.
Thursday, January 03, 2008
Date #42.2 has been set
I've been talking to 42 quite a bit the past few days since our first big date. The second big date has been set for next weekend. I am really looking forward to it! I've been thinking about the first date a lot and realized that one thing I love about him is that he's perfectly willing to dissect a situation with me and talk about it a lot. Most guys probably wouldn't be so gung-ho about that.
It's a really cool quality. It makes me feel more inclined to talk to him about everything. Literally, it seems like we just talk endlessly about anything under the sun. Partly because we're still gathering data about each other and partly because neither one of us wants to hang up! I am not joking when I tell you he had a list of chain restaurants for me to rate so we could compare our "chain" tastes! It was so cute! During our first date, I asked him what he thought about Applebee's (ick!). Turns out, he doesn't like them either! I was so happy to hear that that I kissed him (a lot!)! It may seem like a stupid thing to agree on, but what if he loooooved Applebee's and wanted me to eat there all the time? Gross! I mean, seriously... is true love worth that much bad food? I think not! (On the other hand, there's always the salad bar and cocktails, which are the only things I would ever order there again.)
This is totally light stuff, but we also talk about the "deeper" stuff. We've already discussed all the stuff that I imagine most "normal" people probably wouldn't touch for at least a month or two. It's been great! Before our first big date, I think we had been talking more seriously (than just IMing) for about 10 days. I joked with him that we had crammed three months of casual, pointless dating into a week! Which I think mainly works because we both are totally down with talking about just about anything.
Now, I have to wait a whole week to see him. Man, that totally sucks! But at least he's just a phone call away!
It's a really cool quality. It makes me feel more inclined to talk to him about everything. Literally, it seems like we just talk endlessly about anything under the sun. Partly because we're still gathering data about each other and partly because neither one of us wants to hang up! I am not joking when I tell you he had a list of chain restaurants for me to rate so we could compare our "chain" tastes! It was so cute! During our first date, I asked him what he thought about Applebee's (ick!). Turns out, he doesn't like them either! I was so happy to hear that that I kissed him (a lot!)! It may seem like a stupid thing to agree on, but what if he loooooved Applebee's and wanted me to eat there all the time? Gross! I mean, seriously... is true love worth that much bad food? I think not! (On the other hand, there's always the salad bar and cocktails, which are the only things I would ever order there again.)
This is totally light stuff, but we also talk about the "deeper" stuff. We've already discussed all the stuff that I imagine most "normal" people probably wouldn't touch for at least a month or two. It's been great! Before our first big date, I think we had been talking more seriously (than just IMing) for about 10 days. I joked with him that we had crammed three months of casual, pointless dating into a week! Which I think mainly works because we both are totally down with talking about just about anything.
Now, I have to wait a whole week to see him. Man, that totally sucks! But at least he's just a phone call away!
Monday, December 31, 2007
The Big Date
The big date this weekend went well. We had a really good time together, got along great, the kissing was good and I think we'll be seeing each other again. At least, that's how it looks right now. No definite plans have been set, but we did speak about it briefly. Also, at my questioning and his request and keeping with the numbers theme, he's officially dubbed "42." Ahhhh, you gotta love geeks! :-)
The real question is, is he my 42?
The real question is, is he my 42?
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